We go camping! The way of the Gay.

It's been a while since a post, but so much has been happening, i've just not been getting to it. But, I finally have something to say again. But brace yourselves, this one's going to be looooooong and offensive to some.

Recently, after a lengthy absence, I decided to check in with the "family's" social circles.- Yes, I went to Pride,one of the numerous after-parties, and attended a gay-themed documentary movie. Now normally, when I used to go out and mingle quite often, this never bothered me, but now that I consider myself older and wiser, I walked away from these experiences with a burning question and a considerable amount of anger and irritation in my heart.

Why, if we identify by the label of Homosexual, do we automatically succumb to stereotypes of camp, loud and just plain freaks? This might be a generalization, because I do know a few "normal" guys, but the "queens" out-number them significantly. I'm considered "old" in gay years and I think i've seen the most that gay society has to offer in terms of sub-sub-cultures, and so far in my observations, majority of gay guys act like they're women!- sorry if I'm offending, but count how many camp gay people you know or have simply seen out, in comparison to "ordinary" people who just happen to be gay.
I have experienced a lot of my friends struggling with sexuality and acceptance. Less than six months after being out and proud, they transform overnight into complete fairies. I've seen the butchest of guys become total queens!!- Since when is that the way of the gay?!?!?!

Now, usually I'm the first one to wave the individual identity and self-expression flags, and I'm still for it!!
Some of my very happily married straight male friends are more feminine than their wives, but come on now gay guys- or should I say girls, what is this?!?!?!

We are gay men, not boys who want to be girls, but like boys, who try to be girls...etc etc etc
In my opinion that, in this day and age, gay activism is high on most of our agendas, and it's mission is simple: To be seen and accepted by society as normal individuals who are equally capable of contributing positively to human-kind with the only difference being, that we prefer the same sex for relationships. We want the same rights and treatment as any other homo sapiens out there.
I also think that this is what it means to have Pride-to stand-up and be acknowledged and valued.
But there is a huge difference in simply standing up, and wearing stilettos so high that nobody has a choice BUT to to notice! Whether they want to or not.

Yes, it's a fun day, and we CAN dress-up if we want to. But think about it... If you dress more alien than normal, shout more than normal, and flap more than normal, then how do we portray a NORMAL image to people who we struggle to get acceptance from? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of Pride? Shouldn't it then be called "Day of freakdom and alienation"?
I myself am a gay man, but even I saw a quite a number of people who I wouldn't want to be seen with, and who frighten the crap out of me! Costumes are one thing, I mean everybody likes to dress-up, but if your general behavior dictates that you SHOULD wear the dress and wings everyday all the time, then I run for the hills.

Granted, we all have our "camp" moments (I do too), but why does gay "mostly" equal feminine? Is it because the connotation of homosexual perpetuates DIFFERENCE/OTHER from heterosexuality, therefore different/other from masculinity, therefore feminine? I really hope not,because the term "gay" relates to sexual preference, not gender-identity. Yet it's more often the case? I honestly don't get it!

I mean, also in terms of relationships and partners, we're constantly looking for that hot "butch" straight-acting and looking-type guy to be our partner, yet some of us present the image of "girl" so much. Now how is a "dude" who is into other "dudes" supposed to find that attractive, or even accurate for that matter, to his sexual preference?

WE'RE GAY, NOT GIRLS!!!

Again, there are a few gray ares. Saying things like "Fabulous" etc. are also part of our culture (if you can call it that), but just like nobody wants religion or politics forced down their throats, I don't think it's a good idea to force your sexual (which is supposed to be private anyway...) preference down people's throats either, by identifying it with camp behavior. In essence sexual preference is such a small part of makes us as humans tick, anyway. There is more to me than who I sleep with.

Yes, identity and self-expression is individual, and so it should be. I think it's a good thing for ALL people, regardless of their gender or preference to be in touch with both gender-sides and therefore have a balanced personality, but if you incorporate the opposite gender so much that you alienate yourself completely from your genetic built-in traits, then I think we have a serious problem.

It makes me homophobic to an extent of my "own people" because, if being gay means being a queen, then I'd rather go play inside the closet where the scary people can't get me and turn me into a fairy.

Being proud and going to Pride is not only supposed to be fun, but also a day where we can freely be ourselves, but I think each of us needs to ask the questions; "Who am I without my sexual preference, and would I date myself if my "personality" is a CONSTANT gay pride parade?

YES, I AM WHAT I AM. BUT I'M ALSO NOT THAT!


And don't even get me started on promiscuity!!! Ok,maybe..... but only once I get this glitter off everything and my knees have recovered from curtsying to "royalty"...

Stay true!
Angry Andy